Qualitative study of forming extra marriage affairs (Case Study: Women and men Divorce applicant in Mashhad)

Extramarital affair is generally kNown as a social issue due to the cultural conditions of Iran, the framework of relations between men and women and the extent of their relationship. By establishing an extramarital affair, social actors are somehow trying to fill the gaps in their marital relationship. In fact, several factors are related to each other and cause the pheNomeNon of extramarital affairs. Sometimes this process begins in childhood and accompanies a set of factors and conditions until marriage and leads to the occurrence of extramarital affair after marriage. Therefore, without identifying these multifaceted and multilevel processes, it will be difficult to understand the pheNomeNon of extramarital affairs. Research

The present study, with a qualitative approach and the technique of narrative interviews, investigated and identified the processes of extramarital affair among men and women seeking divorce referred to the Khorasan Razavi Welfare Organization. In this study, 17 cases of narrative interviews (12 women and 5 men) were performed.

We obtained this study after obtaining seventeen narratives from men and women with extramarital affairs and divorce applicants whose reason for requesting separation was to establish an extramarital affair, drawing specific models for each of them and finally after placing the process models extracted from the interviews. On a more abstract level, there have been five process models. These process models are the result of the existence of similar patterns among the narrators of the interviewees, the combination of the drawn models, the abstraction and analysis of the narratives taken from the interviewees. The extracted processes include the aNomic conditions of the society, the child of the spouse, the couple's conflict in sexual culture, the conflicts in the marital relationship and the religious gap between the individual and the family.

The results of the study of the narratives taken from the participants showed that activists who face childhood prohibitions and compulsions from the family regarding their religious practices, gradually in adolescence and youth suffer from weak religious beliefs, Non-adherence to religious rules and Weak religious beliefs will also lead to personality-psychological problems such as low self-esteem, aggression and negative self-image. In addition, since Iranian society is in transition and there is No specific Norm in which to have an emotional and sexual relationship with the opposite sex during the past years, actors will practically experience an aNomaly in their relationships. In such a situation, due to the lack of a proper Norm, the influence of individuals from their reference groups and friends increases and they do Not find a specific Norm regarding relationships with the opposite sex. For this reason, everyone pursues only their own personal goals. It seems that people who grow up in such aNomic conditions and unrestricted relationships with the opposite sex, if they get married, will generally have a tendency to have free relationships and For this reason, they generally suffer from emotional gaps in their relationship with their spouse. In addition to this psychological distance between couples, quantitative and qualitative dissatisfaction with sex with their spouse can be further cause and lead the actor in the marital relationship to establish an extramarital affair. Also, according to the findings of the present study, in some cases, the criteria for choosing a spouse in women after marriage has changed due to the increase in education and employment, which has resulted in reluctance to spouse and emotional and sexual orientation to another. Finally, the next conflicting sexual culture is aNother process that can eventually lead to an extramarital affair. Experienced before marriage, this conflict in couples' sexual cultures provides the conditions for emotional, behavioral and sexual dissatisfaction of couples with each other.